My near (yet far) future? A road to a PhD in biochemistry, molecular and cellular biology at Cornell University. I got into the program, now what about it? No clue. I'll probably leave as a Dr. by the time I'm 30 (praying for younger). As with all else, I'll plan for it as best as I can and then hope for the best.
How this topic fits into this blog is the question regarding the fate of my rowing life. After 3 years of intense focus and dedication to my collegiate rowing life, how does one deal with a transition from studious nerd to nerd-nerd? The sport has become part of who I am now; there must be a way around this problem....
I did contemplate about trying to walk-on Cornell's novice lightweight crew. At this point, I just want to row. But at 5' 8'', 140 lbs (and slowly dropping), I would think that they try to find the coxswain in me. Am I definitely NOT coxswain material. Of all things, fast-thinking and multitasking is not my thing. I am a critical thinker, of course, but not fast. (Say I do become a coxswain for Cornell, at least I'll be one of the strongest coxswains the crew would ever have!)
My other obstacle (the much more substantial one) is the fact that I would be a PhD graduate student at Cornell. Looking at my first-year course work, competitive crew already seems highly unlikely. As a grad student, I am not only a student but an employee. They are paying me to study AND to work in the lab. The stakes get much higher. Furthermore, I do not know whether I am even eligible for NCAA status as a graduate student. As far as I know, there are none on the team roster.
Whatever the case, I am confident things will work out sooner or later. Patience tend to solve things. Maybe I'll find a nearby rowing club. Until then, all I know is I need to be ready for any opportunities that may await for me.
Hence, my plan for this summer shall be studying, gaining healthy weight, and staying in optimum physical-mental shape.
So this year, my final Dad Vails competition came and went. As unclimatic as I may have sounded, that's the way it went down. That's the way it should have been. In the end, the race lasts 7 minutes and yet you have almost no recollection of it. It is the memory of months of build-up: the happy times, the anguish, the fuck-this-shit moments that stick.
The sun was out. The temperature was in the 80s. The water moderately flat. The people buzzing about as usual at regattas. All was good.
Months of training, of sacrifices: we did not win anything. In fact, our bow seat broke his foot-stretchers on the very first stroke (rest of the boat found out at the end of the race). From there, our boat wobbled from side-to-side most of the race. The boat felt heavier to pull than usual.
But all that did not matter at all. I had built up to my maximum potential at that moment, I pulled as hard as I could ever pull, and I rowed as best as I could. As far as I am concerned, mission accomplished. I walked away, no regrets, no qualms over my personal potential. Sure things could have been different, but nothing within my control could have been any better.
Henceforth, my rowing career with Binghamton Crew has ended. It ended as it should have. I came on quiet, I left quiet. With rare exception, no one knows who any individual rower or coxswain is. Even the known ones are not truly known. Crew is a sport of complete self-dominance, self-respect, and perseverance. Those are the final resolve. Balls to the wall, No regrets.
Today marked Day 1 of the New York State Collegiate Championship Regatta 2010. Despite the unfortunate weather conditions of previous years, today competitors from all over the state were bestowed with near-perfect rowing conditions. For most of the day, the weather was dry, ranging in temperature in the 80s (F), and with almost no signs of bothersome wind. For many of us, this was just about as good as we could all hope for.
The only finals event of the day (my event) was the lightweight men's four w/cox. With an official weight of 136.8 lbs, I think it's safe to assume I was the lightest rower of the pack. The competition was RPI, Binghamton, Stony Brook, Ithaca, and Vassar. We came to the start looking for a repeat of last year: gold. From the very beginning, the competition was fierce. We and Vassar traded seats for nearly 1600 meters, with RPI in a close third. Unfortunately, Vassar was able to inch by in the last 200 meters or so with a late surge to win by 1.6 seconds.
We were forced to settle for second (silver), but it was a good second. We threw just about everything we had and that's all anyone could ever ask for. The judges awarded us silver, but we felt like gold.
The anticipated rematch will be next Friday at the annual Dad Vails, where Binghamton, Stony Brook, and Vassar will again send their lightweights. It will also be my final regatta as a Binghamton rower. I think it's safe to say that we are all anxiously looking forward to that.
"Go home with gold, or go home dead."- D.S.
It has been a month since the last, and much has happened in the rowing life.
SPRING CAMPCamp Bob Cooper, South Carolina, USAEat. Sleep. Row. Asshole.Those were the 4 main things the crew did this year at camp, spring training. Eat a ton. Sleep a bit here and there. Row 2 times a day, 1 1/2 hour per session. And 'Asshole' the card game on our free time (Varsity and Novice men bonding time).
From my personal perspective, spring training was a great success. As should be for any effective rowing camp, lodges were right next to the water, food was right next to the water, and the water was relatively "rowable". Camp setting, along with close proximity, allowed for inter-squad bonding. During much of the pre-camp season at the University, Varsity and Novice squads would not normally mingle much. Camp changes things: for the better. Some friends left as better friends, some left as better acquaintances/friends, and a pair even left as a couple. In crew (and for just about anything else for that matter), better relationships between people are the most important.
From the rowing perspective, 3 hours of rowing (in both calm and chaotic conditions) per day for a week does things to you. It makes you stronger. It makes you smoother. It makes you a better rower. As part of the Varsity men's squad, I know there will little lineup experimenting, but that just meant more time to practice with relatively set lineups. For that one week, each person was unspokenly "assigned" a role in the boat, with the duty to perfect that role.
Rowing with the womenTwice I've rowed in the open women's 8+. They do not realize it but their technique and togetherness is usually quite amazing. The women are mostly weaker, but their technique makes up for that lacking ten times over. The men are strong, but technically inferior. I believe it may have to do with the masculine, ultra-competitive mentality. Each guy thinking for himself, each guy thinking he can out pull everyone else. As a researcher from U. of Cambridge once said, "
to be successful, rowers must develop sort of a...schizophrenic-type mindset." Rowers much think they can out-power anyone else, but at the very same time, must also think they can be anyone else's perfect pair. Hence the saying goes: "
Pick your best 8, not your 8 best."
Winter Training: Jan 4, 2010 - Mar 19, 2010.Two and a half months apparently, in my case, equates to 3.5 seconds. Today marks my end to winter training. What better way to end it all than with a 2k test. THE 2K TEST in my mind.
Since the beginning of training, my mind was set on a 7:20.0 flat minimum. All the nights, weekends, the 150k+ erggings: for that 1:50.0 split.
I started strong, feeling perfectly comfortable: going at 1:48-1:51 for the first 1000. For the next 400m or so, I kept fairly steady my 1:50 pace. Then, my foolish "rest" came about for the next 10 strokes, 1:52-1:53. In the end, I finished at 7:20.5 (1:50.1, 30spm).
Uncontrollably, that was when absolute rage hit me. I was literally half a second from my goal. I knew that those 10 rest strokes cost me my race. I guess it's true, the game of inches (in this case, probably centimeters).
The night before, I was reading quotes from the Oxford-Cambridge crews of the 2009 boatrace. The one that really struck me was from an Oxford rower. Rowing to finish first, even if that means a trip to the ambulance afterward. I wanted that mindset. This morning, I lacked that. I was able to limp about, feel angry, throw things: that is how I know my mind has not fully matured.
I will not be visiting the erg room as frequently anymore. I came a hair-close to what I wanted but not close enough. I can not ignore the fact that I demolished my previous 2k PR of 7:24 but I don't fear making goals that are too high, I fear making goals that are too low. Now that rowing season is just around the corner and rowing camp at Camp Bob is coming up, I should have a bit of wiggle room left for possible self-redemption.
Two days left before the crew's annual make-shift triathlon. The regiment goes:
- 7500m erg
- ~4 miles running
- 10 sets of 15-floor stairs (called "towers")
This is one of the crew's traditions. The winner of each squad earns a hammer, spray-painted over with gold colored spray paint; the symbol of hard-work and pure power/skill. There's no way in hell I'm winning this year, but I'll still put my best effort. As I've made clear over and over, my ultimate goal by the end of this season is to maximize my rowing potential before I'm done. There will not be "I should've done this, I should've tried harder, etc." No bullshit.
One of the hardest things I've been training my mind to do is absolute self-discipline. I think my solo winter training regiment is working very well in that respect. My 2k time has been a consistent sub-7:30, exactly where I want to be. At the same time, I haven't gained an ounce of weight (that fight's getting pretty depressing). So I plan to stick to as much of the plan as I can until we hit Spring Training, then we'll see.
For now, the upcoming triathlon is just a contest: can I overcome myself.
I'm finally back to give updates on my crew training life, as I've been sidetracked by other personal things (hence the unusual delay in updates). I ended up not doing the final 2K of my solo training. I don't like admitting that I'm scare of it; so I won't.
But, upon the return of the crew came a first week of erg tests: 10K, 6K, 2K. For the 10K and 6K, I was able to hit my PRs (set during my solo training) with relative ease. [Not to say that it didn't hurt, but it felt really controlled]. My 2K, done on Friday morning, was a bit disappointing though: 7:31.8 overall. It did not feel easy, but it felt strangely quick though. By quick, I mean a feeling like I might have mentally passed out completely somewhere in the middle of the piece, as opposed to feeling good and fast. That was roughly 7 seconds off my 2K PR, but during the time when I had my before-mentioned "personal things", I put off training.
Overall, my slightly modified Pete-plan seemed a great success. I made vast improvements on my distance erg pieces. If anything, I stayed in great physical shape. I'll try to keep going with this plan (alone I think, my crew is too fearful of the plan) and push that 2K time down.
It's my senior year; it's now or never. PUSH ON.
The weather in Binghamton has been getting much better since yesterday. Sunny, clear and felt like the upper 30s, lower 40s (°F). Looks like spring is starting to pop its head out, though pretty early for a place like this.
Everyone knows that great weather is the catalyst that makes for a happy start of anyone's day. Today was just that day. A great start to the anticipated all-out 6K erg workout of the day.
My original tentative plan was to have an all-out 5K every Friday. But last night and this morning, I had been contemplating the extended version of the devilish 5K. I hadn't done a 6K in well over a year and so my previous times were probably well outdated (my entire 1st year of rowing). The 6K seems to be a more legitimate erg distance than the 5K anyway (according to what many rowing coaches for ask anyway). So I thought why not do it today while I was feeling more upbeat.
As far as my personal improvement was concern, the 6K was a complete success. I was able to pull a 24:22.7 (2:01.8 split at 26 spm). A clear personal record (PR). That was a 30-second total time cut from my last 6K. I'm going to think that, for a 141 pound (64 kg) guy, this isn't so bad.
Next Friday, the anticipation of the gruesome 2K. My PR is currently 7:24 established last April. It probably would be a huge stretch, but I'm hoping for a 7:20 at the very least. This would be the conclusion of my 3-week training regiment and will be the ultimate test for the success of my program. Not sure how much more power this little body can squeeze out but I guess we'll see.
So as promised, I've decided to keep some updates on my solo training (which will last for another week until the winter break ends and the crew returns).
It was roughly 9:10am when I arrived onto the erg-room on-campus. Above is a snapshot of that hellishly beautiful place where agony meets pure self-empowerment. Today's workout: a steady-state 8k (18 to 22 spm). Took it moderately easy today with a 2:09.5 split. Yesterday was a hard day ( 4 x 2000m). I've been trying to alternate "easy" and hard days just so I don't burn out too much.
After the ergo workout came food shopping (my frig. that morning was completely EMPTY!), studying, and napping. Then came the evening gym session with full-body, low-moderate weight training exertion. Just enough to stimulate the muscles.
I've been trying to gain some muscle mass (140 pounds is a bit too light even for collegiate lightweights). This morning, I weighed in at 142 pre-erg workout (140 after). This comes after weighing in at 139 pre-erg workouts for the pass 8 days. For the last 3 years, I've been fluctuating anywhere from 136 lbs up to 140 lbs. I'm praying this up-trend continues a bit more to make a tiny bit easier for cutting my erg times. I know erg times do NOT translate into rowing success, but facing the facts...I'm too light and below average rowers' height (5'8'') and I need to make up that difference in power.
But after all this serious work work work talk, I like to end my day on a light note. So, on a rare occasion, I decided to cook up something I've never cooked up before. Some nice baked ziti. I promise this isn't my usual diet, I SWEAR! But, can't hurt so much to indulge a bit now and then.
Today marks the 8th. day of my winter training this month. While it's winter school break, and everyone's decided to take this time to relax and do other stuff, I've taken the challenge of coming back and starting my training early...SOLO.
At the onset of coming back to the erg room, I was intent on following the Pete Plan (
http://thepeteplan.wordpress.com/the-pete-plan/). The goal was to hit the bricks early on the erg so that I can hopeful hit a 7 minute 2K on the erg. Right now, after 3 years of rowing, my best 2K time is 7:24. But I've never pushed myself as insanely as I was planning to.
Right now, I must say it's gotten much harder every single day. In addition to following the plan 5 days a week (since last week) I've been adding 3-4 nights of weight training a week. Only 8 days into my program, and I'm learning quickly how mentally and spiritually taxing all this solo working out is. I look and feel stronger, but the wear and tear on the spirit is immensely draining.
I've been trying to find a way to avoid this "winter training slump" so many rowers experience but so far I haven't found one that's good for the long term. I did find a great short-term one though: the Rocky movies and soundtracks. They are great! Honestly, they were the only reasons I was mentally able to finish my first week through and through.
But what happens when they become overused? That's what I'm trying to figure out now. Hopefully I'll be able to follow up my routine training soon. Until then, I guess it's continue the grind and pray my spirit doesn't die.
